All throughout the Old and New Testament we see evidence of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. We often see them as different entities for which they are, however, they are also one and bring about unity from within our soul through the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is the connection to the Son and the Father, a gift given by the Son upon his transcendence to Heaven. From Luke in his gospel and in Acts to Paul in Ephesians and Galatians we hear about the promise of the Holy Spirit. 

• Acts 2:38: “Peter replied, ‘Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.'”
• Luke 11:13: “If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!”
• Acts 10:45: “The circumcised believers who had come with Peter were astonished that the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out even on the Gentiles.”
• Ephesians 1:13-14: “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.”
• Galatians 3:14: “He redeemed us in order that the blessing given to Abraham might come to the Gentiles through Christ Jesus, so that by faith we might receive the promise of the Spirit.”

Becoming a believer and ultimately a follower of Jesus we can begin to rely on this gift of the Holy Spirit as outlined above. What happens though when our faith in Jesus only allows for belief in the scripture that makes sense? For me, I struggled with the literalness of each miracle, like raising the dead, healing the blind etc. When I began to think about it, my doubt began to grow. Then suddenly a thought entered my mind, “How can I believe in the resurrection if I can’t believe that Jesus healed the blind or raised the dead?” If I can’t fully believe in the resurrection, then what’s the point in believing anything Jesus said or did? 

Being new to faith I was suddenly scared and didn’t know how to get around this obvious lack of faith. Not knowing what else to do, I did as many in the Bible did; ask for a sign. If my memory serves me correctly, this was and is the only time I’ve asked God to show me a sign for the sake of my faith. When we want something so badly aren’t we willing to do anything for it, even ask God? This wasn’t a selfish prayer; this was a revelation request so that my faith in Christ became complete. My life in Christ had just begun at this point and barriers to my faith became challenges to overcome through prayer. 

Within five minutes of me asking God for a sign I walk into my kitchen and find a pocket gospel by Plus Nothing; which are free and can be shipped to you by visiting the link. I had received the Plus Nothing gospel from a men’s group months and months before. It was very much lost in my car, then found by my son and lost again to me until this day and upon walking in the kitchen I see it laying on the counter. Intrigued by this I pick it up and start flipping through it. In the back you will find references to specific Bible verses, a map of everywhere Jesus walked and a timeline of Jesus’ life. The last entry of the timeline being His death which just happened to be listed as Nisan/April 14 at 3:00 PM. That in and of itself isn’t a huge deal, what is a huge deal is that April 14, 2023 at 3:00PM I suffered a major heart attack. 

The morning of April 14, 2023 I woke up early as I often do and felt like I was coming down with a cold. I did what any runner does when they think they are getting sick; I went for a run. It was only three miles but felt great. Later, while at work our leadership team decided to buy lunch for the entire office. We often do this and choose from an array of different restaurants, that day we picked the place that often serves three pounds of future heartburn; Chipotle. After finishing the giant burrito bowl, feeling satisfied, I began preparing for my afternoon, which included an important call at 3:30. So important that our leadership team felt it necessary to huddle at 3:00. Once connected online, I shared with them that my chest hurts when I take a deep breath and I had commented that Chipotle likely gave me heartburn.

As 3:30 approached my chest no longer hurt when I took in a breath, it hurt all the time. I began to worry a bit because I’d never had heartburn quite like this. I sent a message to a member of my team asking if there were any Tums in the office. He responded there was and now I just had to wait until the call was over to grab them. However, fifteen minutes later I knew something major was wrong. The pain became unbearable. I checked my Apple watch for AFIB and then I checked my heart rate. All signs pointed to normal sinus rhythm, nothing irregular. Something was off, way off. Five minutes later while everyone was in mid conversation I ended the call by wishing everyone a great weekend ahead. Being the host, it booted everyone and one of our leaders on the call came into my office shocked. “What did you do that for?” he asked. 

I told him I need Tums, that the pain that started an hour ago is now crushing my chest and it’s continuing to get worse. By the time he left to find the Tums and when he returned, I was on my floor covered in sweat. Right then, my partner walked by, scooped me up and took me to the hospital. The trip was a blur, and I honestly had no idea at this point I was having a heart attack. I thought panic attack maybe, but heart attack? No way! I’m an athlete I said to myself, I had just run a marathon and continued running 20 to 25 miles per week. But by the time I checked myself in at the ER, my left arm went numb and the second I hit enter on the touchscreen to finalize check-in, I screamed for help. 

Within seconds I was in a hospital bed with a dozen doctors and nurses around me working in unison to save my life. As the doctor said, “you’re having a major heart attack” I’m thinking to myself, “you don’t know me, I’m an athlete”. Once the words registered and my brain caught up with reality, I went into shock. I look down to see my legs flopping uncontrollably. The doctors urged me to slow my breathing down, but between the crushing chest pain and watching my legs flit and flot I found it very hard. Enter stage left, morphine and lots of it. One shot, two shots, three shots and finally the pain is bearable, I calm down, my breathing slows, and I learn that my partner has taken me to the wrong hospital. They’ve called an ambulance and are transferring me to a sister campus that has a Cath lab. 

Once in the Cath lab and the stint was placed, the pain immediately went away. I was taken to the ICU where I’d spend a few hours waiting for the blood thinners to wear down so I could clot the wound in my groin where they gained access to my lower right artery. The whole hospital ordeal lasted only 24 hours and by 4:30 the next day I was at home resting, still wrapping my head around the fact I’d had a heart attack at 43, lucky to be alive. God had a mission for me, I just wasn’t aware of it yet. 

It wouldn’t be until five months later that Jesus would rescue me from a bottomless pit of self-loathing and despair. I begged Jesus to take my life from me in prayer, and as quickly as my heart attack put me on the floor, He picked me up out of the darkness. The transformation was equally as quick as it was profound. One day I was Eric Bucher, the next day I was a disciple of Jesus Christ. A disciple full of the same love for Jesus that He has for me. So, when I came through all this, yet still having doubts about the literalness of His miracles, I felt shame. How could God given me so many second chances, this one being the most dramatic, yet still not able to fully believe in His miracles? Did He not just perform a miracle for me a few months before? 

Doubting the spiritual for belief in the physical is something we all struggle with. Even those who walked with Jesus had doubts, including His half-brother, James. It wasn’t until after Jesus’ death and resurrection that James became a follower of Christ. Then all at once, James became one of His most ardent Apostles. As I write this three days before the one-year anniversary of my heart attack, I wipe the tears away that His grace brings to my eyes. Knowing I spent 44 years of my life with my back not just turned from Him but running from Him, mocking Him and laughing at those who believed in Him. 

Being tied to the physical world when we always seek proof, signs or wonders without asking in earnest will yield nothing. Proof begins with the ability to have faith like a child as mentioned in three of the four Gospels, Matthew, Mark, and Luke. 

Luke 18:16-17: “But Jesus called the children to him and said, ‘Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.'”

For one moment, throw away your opinions give yourself the opportunity to believe and pick up the Bible. Read the book of John in a Bible translation that makes sense to you, (NIV, ESV, NLT) or another version that you feel comfortable with. To those that believe in Jesus, the Bible is a living book. A book that bridges the gap between the physical and spiritual realms. A book that talks about signs and wonders and says it’s okay to ask God to show you. But, for God to show us we must listen with our eyes and ears. It’s through His actions in the physical realm that we receive inside us His spiritual realm via the Holy Spirit. It was no coincidence that my heart attack occurred when it did, nor was it a coincidence that six months later I’d question His miracles and be guided to the pocket gospel by Plus Nothing. 

The Holy Spirit is our helper (John 14:26) who resides inside us to sanctify, teach, persevere, witness, advocate and support our journey to eternal life through service to Him. It’s time to give credit where credit is due and the Holy Spirit, through my belief in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, that He died on the cross for all our sins, big and small, has lit the lamp on the narrow path that only a few will find so that I may spread His good word through my thoughts, words and actions. What does a person have to lose to find twenty minutes to focus on the faith they have, no matter how small, and pray on it to Jesus, asking Him to reveal Himself, asking the Holy Spirit to reveal Himself and asking God to forgive every sin, evil thought or fleshy desire? Matthew said it best in His Gospel in Matthew 17:20 “He replied, ‘Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.'”